Thee year of the Gav

Good morning,  its 6:57 sorry 6:58 on a Saturday morning, I'm sat in a Starbucks. I'm drinking their Christmas blend of filter coffee, they are playing Christmas music. Their Christmas music is different, its light hearted pop/ cover versions. The cast of Casualty sing like Bing, that sort of thing. It's music sung by familiar voices but people I can't name anymore. It's that awkward time of year, the cusp between people thinking it's too early to celebrate but more and more people are doing it so it seems easier to join in and I'm okay with that. There is a Christmas tree in the corner and all of the cups have a festive face on. The corporation is clearly focused at this time of year, but it seems to go deeper than that. Whether it is down to me being up before the sun or the caffeine in the yuletide blend or Starbucks customer service something is stirring in me. Maybe its the nostalgia of Christmases past. Maybe its just Cobham. Whatever ever it is, this big cynic (Me) is turning soft.  It is Christmas and people start to smile a bit easier, they start to think about others a bit more and try to be the people they always wanted to be. I'm not a fan of 6:57 or 6:58 for that matter, but I am a fan of nice, people being nice and people realising that they have been nice to (I'm not sure that makes sense)
I hope you have a lovely end of 2014 and a cracking beginning to 2015, I hope you are able to see the people that make you feel good and I hope that I get to see you, if I am one of those people to you. Best wishes Gav

December 31st

So that’s it, it’s done, the final page

I’ve been longing for this date

I’ve transcended my health and age

Now, it can finally abate

It’s been a test of endurance

It’s taken all of my nerve

Thank you for your deference

For taking the time to observe

This year, you have been a viewer

To one man’s struggling cries

Idea’s came less fast and more fewer

And the lows outnumbered the highs

But our hero, stuck to his convictions

He courageously stuck out his chin

He conquered negative predictions

And changed his lose to a win

However my work is now treated

Whether ridicule or with rejoice

I’m glad that it’s finally completed

I’m glad there are words for my voice

This book has taken some attending

With hard work and all of my heart

And although it feels like the ending

I know that it is only the start

December 30th

It's not going to be a deal breaker

Its won't show up in the stars

It wont realign the equator

It's not pure energy for cars

It's not going to be a best seller

Or help with curing hunger

It won't be deemed as stellar

It won't make you look any younger

It won't make the ladies love you

It won't stand you out from the crowd

It wont help become more impromptu

It wont silver line your grey cloud

But for me this has been my beginning

For me, it has changed my sky

I've jumped on the world as it's spinning

And submitted my right to reply

For those of you who know me

And my often laid back style

You've helped clear up my debris

And restored my inner smile

Feel free to accept your commendation

With out you, this couldn't have happened

You've made my year a sensation

Feel free to jump on the bandwagon

For the input you feel you have

I'm sure you'll quickly agree

This has been The year of the Gav

Thank you and well done me!

December 29th

Trying to express how I feel

Waiting upon the final reveal

I want explode and tell the world

Fly my flag fully unfurled

My eyes well up with sadness

Outweighed by the relief and gladness

Awoken from my daily hypnosis

Sad and happy in solid osmosis

Glowing and internally proud

Wanting to shout out loud

Look at what I have created

my first achievement, culminated

I'm amazed that the end is near

Really, has it been a year?

It's flowed and dragged in equal measure

Giving as much pain as pleasure

I'm atop Everest with Hillary and Tenzing

I'm Frodo Baggins disposing of the ring

My journey hasn't stayed unblemished

First stage is over but not finished

The writing weight has been lifted

For now the pressure has shifted

I'm entering a chapter of not knowing

And with your help, I'll keep the impetus going

December 28th

Next the task of editing

Next comes time for reason

Next is constant head hitting

Next comes silly season

Next is time to reflect

Next comes celebration

Next is the job to dissect

Next comes irritation

Next is staring blankly

Next comes empty head

Next come statements frankly

Next comes things unsaid

Next a time for thinking

Next comes a plateau

Next is confidence shrinking

Next comes, I don’t know

Next is desperately needed

Next is judgement day

Next precedes succeeded

Next is the only way

December 27th

What now, I've finished writing?
What now, for the New Year?
What new project needs biting?
What next is still unclear
What happened this year was amazing
What happened to me as a man
It gave me more focused gazing
It gave me the start of a plan
The people who chose to come with me
Give me the strength that I need
The show of support and energy
Changed me and helped me succeed
Your part is not taken for granted

It laid foundations for my pride

It gave me sense of seeds planted

And help them to grow inside

What now, as I reach the curtain?
What next? As I take my bow
I wondered but now know for certain

The future of ‘me’ is right now. 

December 26th

may your future be pleasant

may your adventures all be new

may your mind always be present

And your skies always be blue

May the new year make you wise

may it bring you happiness

may you breath in every surprise

and feel your sorrow less

May you keep yourself together

May your family be your guide

May you take, always, good weather

May you feel more satisfied

May you share in all the good times

May you cancel out the bad

May you taste a little sublime

with the struggle you have had

May you always be forgiven

by those who know you best

May the love that you have given

be returned with interest

May you start to open up doors

may your windows open too

may you soak up all the applause

That is aimed at you

December 25th

Head together for the final week

Glint in my eye, tear on my cheek

Looking bright, where once looked bleak

No words can describe

The count down reaches single figures

there's so much more now to consider

Instead of shrinking it's getting bigger

Makes me feel alive

There's lots more to get done

Many more tales to be spun

The marathon is only half run

I didn't mean to start this

But every step is a delight

less darkness coming into light

The first time I've had to fight

And now I cant resist

Looking forward to the next step

And to being out of my depth

hold your nose, take a deep breath

Get ready for the wave

Who'd of thought this time last year

That'd I'd would get this near

Thank you all for being here

I believe in being brave

December 24th

We wave farewell and good bye land

My once upon a fairytale highland

Until we return to my beautiful island

keep the people right

from the memories of yesteryear

to friendships that we still hold dear

warms our minds when we're not here

humble and polite

from the joys of the property trade

to the memories, forever delayed

Thoughts belong to those who stayed

keep carrying the light

you always give me that comfort feeling

which leaves me to question the meaning

Why are you always semi appealing

free and a fancy flight

I miss and permanently reminisce

with warmth and difficult to resist

I'm caught up in a loving tryst

I love my Isle of Wight

December 23rd

I’m going to get out more, not become captive

Take the reins by being more proactive

Shout out loud, I’m done with keeping quiet

Doing more will become my New Year diet

I’ve had enough of being regular Joe

I want to be a better me, by doing what I know

I don’t know how, but it’s worth a try

I’ll make another pass as the world is passing by

Joining in will become my new religion

Taking chances is my next decision

Having an opinion is your prerogative

Surpass the minions, by being positive

Open more doors just by saying yes

Say farewell to subtle and finesse

What’s the point of having ideas?

If you keep it locked in doubts and fears

Be who you are, just come out and say it

It’s your guitar, but how often do you play it

Use your time to become effective

Show them how, write your own directive

If you want to achieve and make it through

You have to believe in what you do

December 22nd

Words don’t come as easy, thoughts are not as nice

Subjects far too cheesy, repeated once or twice

Now I’m not controlling, now I’m out of bounds

Preparing for consoling and hearing sorry sounds

Where once I had energy, where once freedom reigned

I’m lacking moral synergy, and feeling talent feigned

Once more unto the breach my friends, once more pen to pad

Once more to project that never ends, once more to raving mad

It wasn’t meant to be this hard, it was meant as a soft gesture

Now I’m feeling mentally scarred, as draining starts to fester

But what of feedback mentioned, what of the positive thoughts

Wouldn’t that help to aid ascension and help find the path that is sought

It’s only by writing and reading, it’s only by growing inside

That you’ll find the path for proceeding, you’ll get back into your stride

So take bad, the ugly and good make best use of all feelings

Without the down times and deadwood, you’ll never know you need healing

December 21st

It began as fun, lighthearted

And for no particular reason

From back when it all started

I have found a little cohesion

I’ve learnt that mental health

If worked at, can be achieved

Personal gain and wealth

Appear when you start to believe

I wondered, if too much, I was tackling

Approaching a task, this intense

The possibility of this actually happening

Would be left to daily suspense

So what do I take from this procedure?

What lessons do I think I have learned?

That everyone can be a teacher

And it’s not always bad to be burned

Forgive me if you think it’s a lecture

It’s my first attempt, first occasion

It’s merely my primary conjecture

It’s not meant as pushy persuasion

I hope you’ve enjoyed my poetry trail

I hope you have shared in the laughter

I hope that my book is a fairytale

And it lives happy ever after

December 20th

I have friends from different walks

Friends in constant juxtaposition

But there is one man, when he talks

I always make time to listen

His talent,positivity and his drive

To the highest heights have grown

And my fire, that's been lit inside

Was sparked by the match of his own

You'll never hear a negative

He'll always be uplifting

He's heavily hyper active

With constant project drifting

He doesn't swear and doesn't drink

But always buys a round

He give his peers cause to think

with actions quietly profound

His belief and his lust for life

Are matched by a winning format

That when he sharpens his knife

He kills what he takes a stab at

You've earnt all you're going to have

I'm blessed to have a friend so true

The fact is, The Year of the Gav

Wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for you

December 19th

I was just a young boy, sitting on my fathers knee

talking about the future and where I'd like to be

We sit and talk for hours until and in the background music played

That music would surround me, and in my mind it's stayed

I flicked through his collection, he hum me every line

He sit there and he'd tell me that what was his was mine

I've kept that memory with me and never will I lose it

And everyday, with songs they play, I remember daddies music

I play those songs, bring back memories strong, when I'm feeling homesick

they were great times, but I can't rewind, to hear my daddies music

Another time that I'd go back, if you could grant my wishes

Is after dinner, plates are stacked, my mother washing dishes

We help out as much we could, by putting things away

I thought back then the tunes no good, but I love them all today

I've kept that memory with me and never will I lose it

And everyday, with songs they play, I remember mothers music

And as I'm getting old myself, and my tastes have all expanded

I look upon my CD shelf, and see the music I've been handed

I do not see the songs and bands, my memories are all I see

I can feel their loving hands in the music they gave to me

So if I have a young boy and he sits upon my knee

I can share the music that my parents gave to me

December 18th

I've impressed this year, I've impressed myself

I've excelled and expanded my mental health

I've stuck to a task and seen it completed

Not won the race, but at least I competed

I can see the finish and the land promised

I've been more open, pure and honest

I've explained each time when I felt exertion

I've feel I've become a much better person

I found myself better each time I explored

And thankfully found that I'm not fatally flawed

I've written well when I've been on empty

And not given up when my demons tempt me

I've been controlled in all situations

And dug even deeper when brain took vacations

I've acted and reacted in a constructive way

And I said something about nothing to say

I've was all alone as I stuttered and stumbled

Picked up politely by pals and felt positively humbled

In my wildest dreams I never thought of succeeding

This year has been great and thank you for reading

December 17th

On a London street, a Christmas bell rings

A star shines over, our stories, three kings

One a writer who's writing was random

One an actor as cool as Camden

One, a film maker talented and tall

When bought together, geniuses all

The lights, the season and festivities

Only help increase productivity

And Christmas, like our friends here

Only happens once a year

For our trio, London couldn’t be more pleased

As it rewards them for opportunities ceased

Their just rewards of jovial jollity

They feel the full force of festive frivolity

Time passed quickly talking of times past

Colourful times they compare and contrast

The greatest of times made better by lights

One time, three kings, putting the world to rights

December 16th

What if nothing changes?

What if it all stays the same?

What if all these exchanges

Are only ever in vein.

It’s all just scribbles on a page

I’m a poet with no bookings

Like a punch in my rib cage

Just when I wasn’t looking

Too many times I started something

With so many great ideas

Don’t become a meaningless fling

Forgotten over the years

I know that it’s all down to me

It’s how I choose to spend my time

Dutiful daily diary devotee 

And reap rewards that are mine

Even when I finished writing

There’s still so much more to do

I hope its hard work that I’m inciting

And this time I’ll see it through

The first thing that I’ve completed

Don’t underestimate the part you play

At least I can say I competed

And progressed more than half way

December 15th

My year has been a remarkable one

As I gloss over everything I've done

I'm proud of all the yarns I've spun

Now it’s nearly finished

I think back to my humble beginning

When I had just started spinning

With no thought of actually wining

My desire did not diminish

Although I may have said this before

My tiny mind is getting sore

I’m patiently waiting at the stage door

With thoughts that it might open

I walk the streets and hand out flyers

And talk to the prospective buyers

These are my dreams and my desires

Who knows, but here’s hoping

Whatever happens in the New Year

Whichever direction my new career

This will always be honest and sincere

Something I’ll constantly have

In the future when at desk and chair

I’ll think back to my first writing affair

I’ll be proud of my daily diary despair

I’ve loved, The Year of the Gav.

December 14th

I was there, it wasn’t a dream

I was where the brightest lights beam

It was beautifully draped in a Christmas theme

I want to be there again

The city called and I responded

The city and I instantly bonded

I said goodbye and unwillingly absconded

But a bit of my heart remains

Your glorious noise, your lovely drone

Around every corner, nothing unknown

Millions of people, but we were alone

Beautiful burning lights

Your skyline, with love, designed

Will be etched forever on my mind

And to your charms, I have resigned

Glorious glowing nights

New York, you strange and crazy you

Keep on doing what you do

A lasting impression on my debut

Love you to your core

I was there, it was a dream

I was where the subways steam

The greatest place I’ve ever been

Until I’m there once more

December 13th

Everyone’s nicer around Christmas time

Everyone breathes a little lighter

Everyone’s moods are more sublime

And Everyone’s future looks brighter

But come the end of January

Come the deep set of winter

We all start seeking sanctuary

Our dreams seem to buckle and splinter

So this year make sure you envelop

The warmth that daily surrounds

Be thankful and positively develop

Your nearest and dearest around

Christmas has all kind of delights

With presents all wrapped with bows

Remember the feeling of tree lights

And the comfort with every glow

Don’t forget that warm feeling

Don’t put it out with the tree

Fill up your heart to the ceiling

Be as great as you can be

You don’t even need Christmas presents

For this feeling to come your way

You just need to be honest and pleasant

And it’ll be Christmas everyday